Stress, Struggles, Trials, and the little joys in between

I was going to post a Facebook status, but then I decided I had too much to talk about, so I'm coming back to blogger with lots of different things going on in our lives right now.
After we moved back to Arizona in 2013, we lived with Jon's grandmother Sonia up until June of this year. We wanted to get back out on our own, even if we were skating by. So thats what we're doing. But somehow, I am still optimistic. Through all of these financial and medical trials, God sure shows us that he is there. Surely many of you know that a couple of years ago, I began to have extreme unexplainable back pain. The pain lessened slightly over time, but came back with a force this year to the point where I was left wondering how no doctor could explain the pain. So about a month ago, I went to see another doctor, and after we played the waiting game (which is a doctors favorite game), I was told I have arthritis in my back. It was a simple straight answer from some lady that called from the doctors office and told me that she would put in a request for a referral to a pain clinic. No further explanations or answers. That just wasn't good enough for me. I was scared out of my dang mind, and don't be fooled, I am still scared, but I wanted answers. My relief society president of our current ward had just been called into that position and it couldn't have been a better time because I found out through talking to her that she has a really bad case of arthritis. She has lived with it most of her life. She gave me comfort, suggestions, and advice. It was a wonderful blessing in my time of stress. So then I set up another appointment with my doctor so I could get some more answers. I finally get in to see her, and asked questions and she finally gave me the referral to the pain clinic. She told me I have a degenerating disc in my lower back.  If you're not sure what that is, basically the cartilage that is between my vertebrae is going away. It can cause severe pain in the back and legs, it can press on your nerves, etc. Anyway, so now after my appointment at the pain clinic, I may be doing another MRI, and I am likely to be starting up physical therapy again.
The other thing I was told is that I have very high cholesterol and so I needed to change my diet, and lose weight. So because of that bit of information and the fact that I do not want to take cholesterol medication, it scared me into doing what's right. The blessing of all this mess is that I have now lost 15 pounds in the past couple of weeks and that is just a downright miracle. I have cut out all the snacking, Cut out a lot of pasta, and fruits and veggies have been my go to. Not to mention, all the exercise I get at work is probably helping. Well anyway I wanted to share a couple of trials and such to update. I may be starting to write in here more, or at least I am going to try!

Thoughts about a current issue from the media

Hey everyone. So, it has been quite some time since I have posted anything on this blog. I didn't want to post my thoughts directly to facebook on this issue because I wasnt quite sure how long it would really be. In regards to the current hastag: #IStandWithCherish, I wanted to put some thoughts out there to ponder. (here is the article explaining the story of what happened to Cherish) http://hellogiggles.com/istandwithcherish-social-media/
Anyway, My thoughts start here: All of the sudden, after many news stories of several different moms leaving their kids in a hot car, or forgetting about their kids and leaving, we have a story about a young mom named Cherish. Suddenly, people are rising against the judgemental people in this world. The ones who are calling these mothers names, and saying how DARE that mother even call herself a mom if she can't even remember her own child?! They are forming a group called IStandWithCherish. Its all over the place. I was even added to the group. My controversial thoughts on this start here: Why did we not defend all of the previous mothers that had a similar issue? Were there facebook groups rising against all of the people judging these mothers? If so, they were very quite. Why all of the sudden are we standing up for one mom? Was her story any different? Not really. So what makes it okay all of the sudden? I do believe that all mothers make mistakes, and we are not all perfect. I just am not sure I understand why we are all fighting for the cause of one woman suddenly, when we didn't have any nice words for the women who came before her.
Food for thought. Just thinking out loud, wondering if anyone else had the same thoughts as me.

Many changes, including a new addition to our family!

 We have many new things going on in our lives! On September 2nd at 4:14pm, Logan Andrew Garcia was born! It sure has taken me awhile to update this. He is 5 months old now! Obviously ive been a busy woman. My little ones are 15 months apart, and Kayleigh loves her little brother. Logan loves Kayleigh too. You can see how he just lights up everytimes she pays attention to him! I wonder how that will change over the years.... HA!
I'm just going to put some random things here on this post that have been going on, since I wanted to update, but I'm also exhausted like nobody's business! I don't know how mothers of more than two manage! I give props to all of you! Having two has made me just want two! I am not finalizing anything... but thats sure how I feel currently....
Since October 31st, I have been on and off sick as a dog. It's been ridiculous. I mean seriously. I have had colds that last a week, and even through November I had a bad cold or flu or something WITH bronchitis that lasted over a month! Now I'm just getting over another week long cold. SERIOUSLY, WHY????!!
Other than that, Kayleigh has been learning so many things! She knows that 2 comes after 1, and shes a bit stuck on 3 and 4, but she gets allllll excited when I say 1,2,3,4.... and she shouts 5!!!!!!!!! It's pretty cute. She is an expert at unlocking my iPhone, and she knows how to get into Netflix and her games. Sheesh. She names a bunch of animals and letters, and she points at the moon and says "moo? MOO!?" Also she says "aipla aipla" for airplane, and she attempts helicopter. It's kinda like "hopocopa"
Logan is growling, screeching, laughing, cooing, smiling, and trying his best to sit up. He loves to grab his toes, and he prefers to stand in your lap most of the time. HATES to lay down. lol.
I'll post a few pics, then its off to the bed I go!

Discovering who I am.

I really don't think I realized how much of a life altering change it would be to quit my job and commit full time to my baby. (Soon to be babies). It has taken me down a roller coaster of different emotions that I experience on a daily basis. I used to socialize with my work friends, and the customers that came in day by day. I would come home and then devote the rest of my night to my beautiful little girl kayleigh jade. It was a balance. A life. Something that kept me slightly sane. Of course work can make you irritable sometimes and then caring for your infant is difficult at times. This was also at a time where I wasn't 6 months pregnant while caring for an 11 month old who is starting to realize that mommy said "no" and that means she can't have everything she wants. This sometimes turns into small fits or tantrums that I am discovering are rather frustrating and something that I have to learn how to handle. I realize that parenting is hard. I know that being a mother requires patience and love and nurturing and lots and lots of attention. It's the hardest full time 24/7 job that anyone can ever have. No I don't just sit on my butt all day and relax. I only wish I could do that sometimes because pregnancy is tiring and sometimes painful. I am up and running all the time. I am the pregnant energizer bunny. I don't stop. And I have to admit that I feel like a terrible housewife. I suck at cleaning and keeping things nice and neat. I am currently trying to slowly focus on one thing at a time with housework but it's practically impossible for my worn out painful body.
My baby girl will be walking any day now. She is so close. She makes me proud. It's a chore I work on with her to try and get her to walk a little each day. Practice makes perfect.
I had one of those mental breakdowns tonight. They are the worst when you are all alone and your husband doesn't come home til 11:30pm. I just feel miserable sometimes when I am sitting there after I put kayleigh to bed and I realize I'm alone, bored, and I wish for company. I wish my husband didn't have to work the pm shift. it's basically all day because he sleeps all morning and then wakes up and has like 2 hours before work.
I am truly hoping for new beginnings and changes that are likely to happen within a year. Possibly a career change for Jon and the baby will be here in September. I am scared to death to be the mother of two children so close in age. I pray each night for strength to be able to handle whatever comes at me. Through all of the roller coaster emotions I know somehow someday things will get better.
I apologize for the long rant that is my blog entry. I needed to get some of that out. If you read all that, thanks for listening. To lighten the mood I will post some pictures of Kayleighs adventure today at the mall.

Lots of updating to do!

I can't believe how long it has been since I've actually posted something on Blogger! I have so many updates since the last one. We've moved to our old apartment San Montero which is much more spacious for us and it certainly has made things easier on me as a pregnant mommy. Pregnancy is super incredibly difficult when you already have an 11 month old crawling everywhere and on everything and everyone. I love my little Kayleigh so much though. She has been a blessing in our lives and so many other lives. She lights up a room whenever we bring her in. She is always smiling laughing and playing. Of course she has her temper tantrums.. what baby doesnt though? It's a matter of patience and understanding and trying to figure out exactly how to handle her when she screams at me or throws her head back and cries.. If it weren't so frustrating, it'd be funny! She's only 11 months old and throws fits! Ha! Come to find out, I guess this is a normal things. She's starting to learn that she can't have everything that she wants, and she doesn't like it. Well, she will learn =) In March, I quit Best Buy to be a stay at home mom... I honestly miss having a job! I am not the type of person to just want to stay at home all of the time. It gets pretty lonely and difficult sometimes. I don't understand how all these mothers do it without going insane! They have to go insane! I mean I do, often! Days go by and sometimes I forget whether it is Monday or Thursday or whatever. I am hoping that after the next baby comes I can possibly take some photography classes and art classes. I want to take up a hobby and possibly a profession. I want to get really good at photography. I feel like out of all of the different careers I've considered, this one sticks out the most. It makes me the most excited and happy when I think of it. I hope I can do something with it eventually, and I know I will. Well, for now I'm going to start out with this small update, and also share a couple of recents of Kayleigh. (Oh, and no we have not yet picked a name for baby boy, and for those of you who thought we would name him Jayden, it is crossed off..) We will pick something, hopefully something not too popular, but we shall see =)

It sure has been a while, but I'm back!

I'm finally back to civilization, and I can gladly say that I am on my own computer, with good speed internet, and I'm excited to finally post my birth story, pictures from June 13th, the day my beautiful baby was born, and then of course picture from then til now.
Kayleigh Jade Garcia was born on June 13th, 2011 at 10:37 AM on Monday morning. She is now almost 3 months old. I know, shame on me for not keeping up with my posts, but you know what? I was in Casa Grande, where the internet was kinda useless, so I basically used my phone for internet lol. Thats alright, like I said, im here now and Im happy to say that im finally starting to get my baby girl on a schedule that will allow me to get things done such as this blog update, and my baby cross stitch project which is ALMOST done by the way, and I plan to print out pictures of kayleigh and our whole family to scrapbook and put into photo albums. Oh and eventually i will get my new temporary home clean. "Temporary" because Jon and I have moved into my cousin Amanda's townhouse for the time they are in Utah attending school. We might leave earlier than the 3 or 4 years, but that will be if we can find a house of our own, and qualify. Once I get the place cleaned up enough, I will post pictures of it as well, but for now, im gonna start with my birth story, and pictures of that day.

Kayleigh Jade: Birth Story:

June 12th, 2011

Jon and I arrived at the Banner Desert Hospital in Mesa, AZ bright and early on Sunday morning. The plan was to be induced.. I could hardly stand pregnancy anymore, and was about ready to burst... yes, literally.
I received my first set of 'gels' at 8 in the morning, and i was to stay in bed for the first hour, the second hour I could get up and move around.. thank goodness too, because i was sure getting annoyed with the tight monitor around my belly, and i was all hooked up to the machines to be monitored in various fashions.. such as my contractions, baby's heartbeat, so on and so forth. I received another set of gels a couple hours later.. then an hour or so after that, i welcomed my contractions, gritting my teeth and clenching the hospital bed railings. No way was I going to be weak, I could take it.

Sure, Courtney, you can totally take it... because after a while I said... NO, I dont want to feel this crazy pain anymore. Who would! Yea, I know, that doesnt make me weak, it just means that i'd rather be comfortable. I received stydol (unsure of the spelling), basically its a pain med that would still allow me to get up (if i could) instead of being hooked up to the bed.

It sure threw me for a loop, I was totally out of it, and i didnt really feel the pain anymore. This lasted for about an hour, and at this point, I said HELLO to my contractions again. I got more of the stydol, but it didnt do anything for me.. I waited, feeling the contractions and trying to decide whether I just wanted the epideral already. At this point, the nurse had been checking every once in a while to see if I was dialating... I was BARELY dialating, and it had been HOURS... most of the day had gone by. I wasnt getting hardly any rest, but PLENTY of visitors.

I finally got my epideral, and it felt like a hot sharp poke in my back, but ten minutes later, i was numb everywhere and the contractions were only apparant on the monitor and the tightness of my belly. This was good. I was definetely annoyed with the pain of the contractions. haha!
Hours of waiting, and plenty of attempted rest, and attempted movement, and tingly feelings in my legs and feet went by and needless to say it was well into the night and i was wondering when the heck my little one was going to decide it was time to make her big debut.


June 13th, 2011

The epideral was starting to fade, and i could move my left leg, and I knew when I needed to push, starting around 8am, I started pushing, and the task wasnt easy. It lasted for 2 hours, and I felt intense pressure with each contraction.. They gave me more epideral, but I can honestly say that i dont think it was enough, because by the time my doctor came in, and my baby was ready, getting her out was definetly the worst pain ive felt in my life. But once it was done, I felt a great relief. I was exhausted, but numb as I was being stitched together for at least 15 minutes... *cringe* They put little Kayleigh Jade right up on my chest after she was born and wiped off, and I held her close, it was such a neat and spiritual experience I was just in shock.



They took her away to do shots, tests, and all that joyful stuff that babies have to go through after the trauma of being born, lol, and I realized I was STARVING.. My mom brought me a sub, and soda, and I layed in bed for a half hour. I slept on and off. I then thought I was ready to move to the recovery room. I was wrong. They tried to help me to the bathroom first, I managed to be wheeled in there... and once I sat down, I realized I wasnt gonna make it. I put my head down, and heard the nurses say ok we need to get you back to bed. I passed out completely, and I have to say that was the first time ive experienced passing out to this degree.. it was insane, a sickly feeling, I realized that i was back in my original bed and was told I should lay there and wait. Eventually I was moved to my recovery room, and jon and i werent released from the hospital until wednesday the 15th.
It was quite the experience, and it was quite worth it.

Kayleigh Jade

She is the joy of my life, and I love being Kayleigh's mom!

More to come... I plan to post more pictures, not only of Kayleigh, but of the townhouse, our family, and more stories of our new life!!! :-D

My Best Buy Baby Shower!!

The first four pictures are from the Baby Shower that my friend Dave (and his wife) from my work threw me! It was fun! Even though only a few went, a good portion of people pitched in to buy my car seat! How awesome is that!!! The last picture is a bouncer we got from the shower that i absolutely HAD to put together once i got home. I'm super excited about it! It plays music and that bar at the top is removeable with toys on it. We got tons of clothes, bibs, a keepsake box and a baby journal, a car seat toy, and the car seat and base!